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DeWanda Wise & Blair Underwood Play A Polyamorous Couple In Three Women & It Gets Messy

DeWanda Wise knows she’s a force to be reckoned with. So, it’s not surprising that the characters she portrays exude an aspirational level of confidence and ambition. From her role as a talented, free-spirited painter on Spike Lee’s Netflix series She’s Gotta Have It to playing a ride-or-die friend in Someone Great and her scene stealing work as badass pilot turned contractor Kayla Watts in Jurassic World Dominion, Wise’s extensive portfolio of TV and film credits speaks for itself. 

In her latest role in the STARZ drama Three Women, Wise plays Sloane, a character who appears to have it all. A successful career. A loving husband. A “picture-perfect” family of three. But, there are cracks in between Sloane’s picturesque lifestyle. In the series, Sloane is one of three women who pursue fulfilling their personal desires, which turns their lives upside down. Lina (Betty Gilpin) yearns for passion in her marriage but finds herself in an affair. Then, there’s Maggie (Gabrielle Creevy), who longs to be believed after accusing her married English teacher of inappropriate behavior. 

Legendary actor Blair Underwood stars alongside Wise as her husband, Richard. While the scene partners complement each other, their Black love story explores unfamiliar territory as their characters have an open marriage. Although conversations about polyamory have increased in recent years, it remains a taboo subject in Black communities. Wise and Underwood know that their storyline may still be unconventional, but they are not afraid to expand people’s minds and normalize discussions about polyamory. “Multiple partners have been going on forever,” Underwood told Refinery29 Unbothered. “But we put it in a different box today. And that’s the thing. It’s more open. It’s more accepted in conversation that it’s okay to have multiple partners as long as you all are cool with it. As long as there’s no betrayal in that. That’s where it becomes messy when there’s betrayal.”

Underwood is right. Three Women shows the consequences of breaking the boundaries that come with an open relationship. After bringing a new male partner into their arrangement, Sloane’s fascination makes it harder for her to let him go. As a result, her enthrallment threatens her marriage and relationship with Richard. Add in Sloane’s mommy issues and her battle with perfectionism, this character is as complicated as they come. But, the messiness and complexities Wise portrays as Sloane are what’s most captivating about her character. With Underwood acting beside her as Richard, they expose the intricacies of polyamory by taking viewers on a rollercoaster of emotions.  

Over Zoom, Wise and Underwood tell Unbothered about the explosive 10-episode series, their perspectives on polyamory, and the power of seeing imperfect Black women on screen.

Refinery29 Unbothered: DeWanda, when you found out you would get to play this part where you were married to Blair Underwood —  thee legend Blair Underwood! — what was your reaction? 

DeWanda Wise: I think I was the first actor cast. This is the sequence of events because it still makes me laugh. It still cracks me up. Lisa Taddeo (author of Three Women) and Laura Eason (showrunner) are enormously collaborative to the point where I saw Betty Gilpin’s audition tape, which I should not have. It’s just crazy. From the very beginning, they pulled me into the full process. So, I remember when they hit me up and were like, “Hey DeWanda, how would you feel about Blair Underwood as Richard?” I was like, “Well, who am I to deprive the world of as much Blair Underwood as it could possibly get?” It was the craziest thing to me. I was like, “Why are you asking me?”

Blair, what was it about working with DeWanda that got you excited?

Blair Underwood: First of all, her reputation precedes her. Ava DuVernay is a dear friend of mine. We were just conversationally doing the project, and I mentioned DeWanda’s name. She said, “That’s my girl. She’s amazing. But aren’t you too old for her?” I said, “Don’t worry about that. Don’t worry about all that. That’s a part of the story.”

Like I said, her reputation precedes her. But also, she’s incredible. She’s brilliant. She’s an amazing person, but her work is impeccable…The fact that she was playing this character and she’s a chocolate beauty was even more exciting to me because of who she is and what she represents internally in her spirit, but also physically. She’s the whole package. So, I was excited about the idea of working with her. Then, I got the chance to know her, and it was incredible.

One of the themes that Three Women explores is desire. What is something personally or professionally that you each currently desire?

DW: I don’t consider myself nearly like Sloane, who is so ambitious. I thought it was a real delight and delicious playing a woman with her degree of ambition and desire. I also found it exhausting playing Sloane. She’s high maintenance. She’s 115 pounds, which is hard to maintain in the winter. You know, you need cushion in the winter. At this moment, I think I live so far in extreme gratitude. Happiness to me is wanting the life you have. So yeah — girl, I’m good. 

BU: I was newly married a year ago and just had our one-year anniversary. My wife and I have nine adult kids. She has 3, and I have 6. Being a parent, my desires are more about them. My greatest desire right now is that they’re healthy and remain healthy. You’re talking about nine different human beings walking through life —your heart walking outside of you. There’s always something going on and the potential of something happening. It’s always a constant prayer to keep everybody safe and wonderful. So, my desire is that it continues and remains. And good health.

Each woman featured has a unique story, yet they share an underlying similarity that has linked them since the start of the series. How would you describe the connective tissue that all three women share?

DW: They’re all ravenous in their own ways. They’re all hungry for more, questioning whether that desire is too much. It’s like, “Oh, I want my husband to touch me,” or “I want to be respected or believed.” Sloane has an interesting combination of actual hunger for reasons we discover in the series and just an insatiable sexual desire. Because of the history of Black women in conversations around how we’re portrayed, I think we conflate female performers, like entertainers and musicians, with how we’re actually seen in storytelling. It’s not the same thing. 

Richard and Sloane have an open marriage. Yet Richard is blindsided by this person who enters the picture in the first episode and doesn’t seem to go away. Why do you believe your character feels intimidated or uneasy about Sloane’s involvement with Will compared to past men she’s brought into the marriage?

BU: There is an element of age. There’s the fact he’s more aligned with Sloane’s age, even though our characters relate on a certain level… He’s intimidated by this younger man coming in. It’s not that they’re having sex because that’s understood that’s going to happen. But the fact is that her heart may be involved, and they’re tiptoeing outside the boundaries of what they discussed. Then, it becomes betrayal. He’s bothered by the betrayal. The intimidation aspect is that he’s probably more youthful, and everything that comes with that…For Richard, it’s a lot about control. I have to control the situation. I just have to be there. I have to see it. I’ll get involved if I choose, but I have to at least be there. Anytime Sloane goes outside those boundaries, it makes him uneasy and takes him off balance. 

It’s more common to see Black couples in a monogamous relationship on screen, so seeing you both play characters in an open marriage is interesting. What was your initial reaction when you both discovered your characters lived this untraditional lifestyle?

DW: The first time I met someone, specifically a Black person, who was in a polyamorous relationship was like 2000. It’s been 20 years since I was introduced to the notion. Since we shot the series, which wrapped two years ago, I feel like I’ve seen more conversations proliferating online, especially among Gen Z and younger millennials. There’s just more conversation about it. In my family, there was a label-lessness of “they’re separated, but there’s no formal separation or divorce.” There wasn’t the same kind of language for polyamory. But that’s what folks have been doing for generations.

What about Sloane makes Richard want to stay and try to make the marriage work despite her betrayal?

BU: He loves this woman deeply. They came together for a reason. He’s excited about it. She excites him. He’s intrigued by her. He’s turned on by her. He loves her. He feels he can protect her a certain way. But she’s not a young victim; she can do her own thing. She’s powerful in and of herself. But together as a team, business partners, and marital partners, there is a strong bond. He can’t quit her. He loves her. He’s intrigued by her to the extent that he’ll do whatever she asks because he loves her that much.

Why do you feel Sloane is compelled by Will even though he threatens your character’s marriage?

DW: There are some things that are indescribable and intangible…Because Sloane is so together, she feels like Will gives her permission to be her unfiltered and most varnished self. And there are not many spaces where she feels like she has that. She comes to remember that she has it with Richard. But in that specific moment in their marriage and personal trajectory, he [Will] represents this fantasy.

Sloane is a complex character. On one end, she strives to be the best version of herself, but on the other hand, she can be self-sabotaging. Why do you think it’s important for a complicated character like Sloane to exist for audiences to see?

DW: I love seeing imperfect Black women. So many of us were raised with respectability politics and indestructible women like your Clair Huxtables. While I admire that and was raised on it, it’s an impossible standard to maintain. So, seeing Black women mess up and be forgiven is really powerful. It’s just that simple. Having more permission to be imperfect will only serve us. It will only lower this blood pressure. It will only lower these cortisol and stress levels. Being a Black woman is exhausting. We deserve to have a little more leeway than we have. 

This interview has been edited and condensed for clarity.

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