As the leader of the bridal party, there’s no denying that maid of honor duties are an important responsibility. If asked to take on the position, this best friend or close relative of the bride will be in charge of keeping the wedding party organized, coordinating pre-wedding festivities, and being there for the highs, lows, and even the bathroom trips of the wedding day (especially when a giant gown is involved).
Yes, the role comes with some pressure—but being asked to be a maid (or man, or person) of honor is absolutely an incredible gesture and sign that you are the number-one person that your friend wants alongside them on one of the most important days of their life. If you’re invited to be a maid of honor, it’s important to understand all the duties that come with this important role so you can be the best support for your to-be-wed.
While the MOH’s level of involvement can vary based on how much the couple wants to plan themselves (or delegate tasks to their planner), there are a few essential maid of honor responsibilities that should be adhered to. Ahead, we break down the most important parts of this major wedding party role.
What Is a Maid of Honor?
The maid of honor is a role designated by the bride as the leader of the bridal party. If the maid of honor is married, you could call them a “matron of honor” instead. Most often, the bride will select their closest friend, sister, or cousin to take charge in this position. In this role, they will serve as the bride’s go-to throughout the entire wedding process—consulting on planning decisions, coordinating the wedding party in communication, planning the bachelorette and bridal shower, and providing logistical and emotional support on the day of the wedding.
Maid of Honor Duties Before the Wedding
So what responsibilities fall into the maid of honor’s to-do list before the wedding even takes place? Ahead we break down the key parts of a MOH’s role ahead of the wedding.
Provide support for the bride
The most important role of a maid of honor is to be a right hand to the bride. Wedding planning is an exciting time, but it also can occasionally feel like a full-time job. It’s also a period where a couple could be having important financial conversations, dealing with tense family dynamics, and making some major decisions. A maid of honor should be there along the journey to provide support as the bride needs, whether they have to vent about making the seating chart or need a helping hand with a wedding DIY.
Lead communication with the bridal party
The maid of honor is pretty much the camp counselor of the bridal party. As the leader of the pack, you will ensure everyone is well informed of any and all plans. You will craft group emails and text messages, create itineraries for the bachelorette and wedding day, and answer the necessary questions that the bride doesn’t have to be burdened with. It’s a good idea to collect all wedding party member’s contact info from the bride as soon as you say “yes” to the job so you can get on top of coordination. Be warned that your role as lead communicator might have to come down to working out any conflicts within the group as well.
Plan the bachelorette
The bachelorette party is likely the biggest undertaking a maid of honor will take. If the bride decides to do a destination trip, you will likely be charged with securing a hotel or Airbnb, organizing activities, making reservations, creating a budget, and getting payments from the attendees. Throughout the event, you should play check-in frequently to make sure the plans are running smoothly and the bride is having a great time. While you might be the leader of the event, it’s totally fine (and encouraged for your own well-being) to delegate and collaborate with other bridal party members to bring plans to life.
Host a bridal shower
Traditionally, the maid of honor would also take charge of planning the bridal shower. Today, that isn’t necessarily the case. While a MOH can still host the bridal shower, a close family member or multiple people in the bridal party may offer to plan the event, too. This party is all about “showering” a bride with gifts while surrounded by close friends and female family members. If you are hosting, it’s important to find a great venue, send invitations, supply food and drinks, curate decorations, and organize fun activities for the guests. You also should help lead the gift-giving part of the event and keep the list of presents organized so the bride can easily write thank-you notes later.
Coordinate bridesmaid dress shopping
Once the bride decides their vision for the wedding party attire, the maid of honor should help to make sure the bridal party all gets appropriate looks. Many wedding parties don’t all wear the exact same dress anymore, so it’s a good idea to work with the bride to send an email with all the details of outfit guidelines, providing timelines needed for orders or approvals, and follow up to ensure everyone has their ensembles ready in time for the big day.
