Ask almost anyone who’s “out there” (which is to say, dating) at the moment, and they’ll tell you: the pool of genuinely promising romantic possibilities has never seemed so shallow, whether you’re looking for a man in finance, a woman to join you at a basketball game, or a nonbinary person to listen to Demi Lovato with. A popular TikTok from creator Keara Sullivan (@superkeara) captured the spirit of this unfortunate phenomenon last fall, telling viewers, “If you’re someone who met their partner on a dating app in the last year and a half or two years, just know that you caught the last chopper out of ’Nam.”
TikTok content
This content can also be viewed on the site it originates from.
A year later, it’s hard to feel like much has changed in the world of Tinder, Hinge, Feeld, Lex, et cetera; to hear some tell it, monogamists are practically an endangered species, while the rise of the situationship has given cover to those who do not, shall we say, have the purest or most noble of intentions when they design their dating-app profiles. (What better way to excuse bad behavior, after all, than by giving it a zeitgeist-y name?)
This is where paid apps (like Raya) and subscription tiers (Tinder Gold, Feeld Majestic, Hinge+, Bumble Premium, and others) come in: there, the thinking goes, users are quite literally more invested in settling down. I’ll admit that apart from one brief, halcyon summer of ponying up for Tinder Gold (and meeting absolutely nobody I liked on it, I should say), I haven’t had much personal experience with pay-to-play dating apps, but lately, comparing and constrasting different apps’ premium fees has dominated the dating discourse among my single friends. So, which paid dating apps actually feel worthwhile, and which ones feel…a little scammy? Like Carrie Bradshaw before me, I turned to my peers for insights.
Kelly, 26, pays for Hinge+ and Feeld Majestic:
“Paying for dating apps is the only time I see or match with people I’m interested in, but once you start paying, it feels like the apps hold everyone good behind the curtain so you’ll start paying again.”
Sam, 32; pays for Raya and Feeld Majestic:
“Feeld is worth paying for so you can see who liked you; it’s the best for queer sexual tourism while traveling. I shouldn’t pay for Raya, but I do because I love seeing the queer celebrities on there. It’s more for window-shopping.”
Maggie, 35, pays for Feeld Majestic:
“I think the cost is too high for what you get, especially with an app as glitchy as Feeld, but it’s the only way to see who swipes on me, so I deal with it.”
Flora, 20, pays for Raya:
“I don’t think it’s worth it. It’s hard to actually match or connect with people, and to be honest, I’d rather meet people in person.”
Matt, 41, pays for Raya and Hinge+:
“Raya was my first paid app and in 2018, it was incredible. At the time, it was not location-based at all, so you’d match with people all over; plus, the app was relatively new, and people on it were almost always interesting and eager to talk to others. That has changed drastically recently, with many more people [joining] but far less engagement. People rarely match, and when they do, they don’t talk to each other, let alone go on a date. I’ve had friends who are high-end runway models struggle to get matches and conversations on Raya. I think most people at this point don’t really consider it worth it, but like being on there.”
Blythe, 29, pays for Feeld Majestic:
“As a queer trans woman, I’ve found Feeld to be the most bang for my buck because its members are able to confidently match my freak. They’re more compassionate, articulate, and secure in asking for what they want. That combo is a frequency I really vibe with. I use it the most while traveling and my entire roster of New York sweetie pie bi guys came to me through Feeld. It’s worth it if you’re seeking people who are often better at articulating the boundaries of their desires, rather than a typical Hinge or Tinder ‘I don’t know what I’m looking for’ conversation-killer.”
Gaby, 34, paid for Feeld Majestic for the last three months:
“Paying for Feeld has been worth it for me in the past, but I’m taking a break for the moment. I have paid for roses and other features on Hinge before and found it to be NOT WORTH IT. Same with Bumble Premium.”
Rachel, 30; pays for Tinder Gold and Feeld Majestic:
“I think Feeld Majestic was more worth the money than Tinder Gold, even though it’s more expensive, because it shows you everyone who swipes right, so you can go through a decent volume of people who will already match with you and are therefore more likely to start or maintain a chat. But honestly, the best thing for my dating life wasn’t either of those apps, but in-person events and speed-dating.”